TEST DRIVE MEME

➞ Post with a character you wish to test drive in this game's setting.
➞ Tag other people's starters and thread out shenanigans!
➞ Invite your friends! Try out new characters! Come play with us!
➞ Have fun!

NOT SURE WHERE TO BEGIN YOUR TEST-DRIVE JOURNEY?
CHECK OUT ALL THE LOCATIONS WE HAVE AVAILABLE IN:

JOHTO | and | KANTO

ALSO, AS PROMPTS FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: Last month's mini-events!

Effect: Friday, July 8: Flower Gift - All day, despite the season, flowers drift down from the sky. They’re harmless, beautiful, and smell lovely, but if trainers aren’t careful, they might end up trudging through rosedrifts up to their knees before long.
Swarm: Tuesday, July 12: Spinda
Effect: Friday, July 15 to Sunday, July 17: Worry Seed - Affected characters won’t be able to get any sleep. Does that make your character cranky? Does it damage their brain-to-mouth filter? The effects can last as little or as long as you’d like over this weekend.
Effect/Swarm Double Duty: Friday, July 22: Surf - Large waves appear in all bodies of water, including things like bathtubs and your Sawsbucks drinks (it’s just bean water, you know). Be careful on the ocean, but also, hang ten, dudes! The waves won’t destroy anything, but trainers are going to get wet on this ride. Also, oh god, small jellyfish Pokemon (Tentacool, Frillish, Inkay) happen to be swarming randomly in these bodies of water. GANBATTE, VICTORY ROAD.
Effect: Friday, July 29: Haze - The forecast is misty inside and out on this oddly cool July day. Affected trainers will find it difficult to remember things, whether those happened long ago or just five minutes past. The memories aren’t gone, of course, it’s just…foggy.
Swarm: Sunday, July 31: Illumise and Volbeat

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OTHER USEFUL LINKS:
NAVIGATION | RESERVES | APPLICATIONS

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, I'll be a kraggon's uncle! Aren't you a sight for sore eyes? ... Well as much as these devices can be a sight anyway!

You got it! Any interesting places to get some junk round here? Since you've been here a while!

Unsavory types eh? Wouldn't want to run into them! Let's hear details!

Actually, these little gadgets are way cooler than ECHO devices! Flip that little button next to your screen. Look at that, video function! Why has no one done updated ECHO tech back home? It...it wouldn't be that hard.

[Things to look into when he gets home: Video ECHOs.]

Ugh, don't say 'a while', I don't like being reminded that I'm stuck here. But yeah, there's caves and spooky woods and crap all over, you should be fine. Goldenrod's the hub, you'll want to set up here. Tech's weird on this planet, though. It's like...both really behind us and ahead of us. It's...you'll see.

[He lets out a bark of a laugh at Janey's request for more details.]

You probably won't avoid it, I swear, it's like there's a secret Fast Travel station between Pandora and here. We've got bandits, Vault Hunters...Janey, there's an honest to god Psycho running around. Psycho mask and screaming about meat babies and everything.

[ ... Okay she gets all of that, seriously, but--

She suddenly looks very, very interested. ]

Vault Hunters? Tell us who we've got, yeah?

....Ugh. That's right, you're an independent contractor. Probably work with Vault Hunters all the time.

[And if he remembers, she and Athena had been kind of...friendly, during the Elpis adventure. Of course.]

Look...the ones here and me? We're not exactly friendly. Through no fault of my own, I've been nothing but reasonable! Happy to stay out of each other's way. I've got a small business, I have people I look after, I don't give a crap about old grudges.

And I've got no problem with you. Why would I? We were buddies. So just do me a favor and don't get in the middle of anything? We don't have to make a whole big thing. That's just stupid.

That's right! They gave me a hand here and there back on Elpis. Managed to get a lot done, actually...

[ ... ]

Aww, is Athena being real mean to you? [ She says it sympathetically...ish.... ] I'll watch myself, don't you worry. Couldn't've survived on Elpis without doing that, yeah?

Yeah, sure, she's being 'mean' in the same way that a toxic gas leak is 'annoying'. I dunno what the hell her problem is. I'd probably have better luck trying to reason with the friggin gas leak.

Ha! Yeah, that place sucked.

Ah, that's too bad! I'll have to have a good, long talk with my wife about her behavior, just for you.

....Oh you have got to be shitting me.

Seriously? Seriously?

You could do way, way better.

[Hell, Janey could probably throw a dead kraggon and in a random direction and hit a better candidate for a life partner. What the hell?]

But yeah. You do that. 'Cause one of us is a law abiding citizen and one of us makes violent threats in public and screams about needing guns. She keeps this up, it's...uh...yeah it's not gonna accomplish whatever the hell she's going for.

Reign in your woman. For her own damn good.

I'm just gonna pretend you aren't judging my perfectly flawless taste, alright? Alright. Glad we got that outta the way!

[ .... AHEM. ]

Yeah, I'll do that. I'll do my best! But you know Athena, she's just too much of a loose cannon...

[ She's trying not to laugh, god. ]

Oh I'm judging it. I'm judging it really hard. I honestly don't see the appeal. And if I remember right, you used to have good taste.

Oh, ha ha, make a joke of it. I'm serious. Your emotionally constipated lady love is on some thin ice. Of her own making.

I guess that's the reason I'm married to her and you're not, huh?

[ ... ]

Aww, loosen your mask clips, old buddy! I'm sure it's not as bad as you're makin' it out to be!

[ haha, making out, which is what she and athena will be doing later AYYYY ]

Well, obviously. Trust me, never had any interest. I mean, why would I, with Nisha right there...

Then my face'd fall off. That's gross, Janey. But fine, whatever. I gave you fair warning, and I'm not gonna drag you into the middle of this bullshit rivalry or whatever it is Athena's determined to keep going. I got no problem with you.

Even if your taste in women apparently sucks.

Yeahhhh, she would've stabbed you right in the face...s... probably.

[ WE'RE HAVING FUN ]

I didn't say you had to do it! I'm not the type to force people to do something they don't wanna do, y'know?

[ Quietly, under her breath: ]

Ohhh, something's suckin', but it's not my taste in women.

[ WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ]

We both know that's not where she'd stab me.

Geeze, Janey, we're bantering! Back and forth, lobbing the ball...back and forth. Speaking of...if your wife lets you, we oughtta grab a drink. They got way nicer booze here than they did on Elpis.

[And okay, so she's married to basically his arch-nemesis, but he did like hanging out with her. And maybe reminding her of that will go toward Athena backing off some.]

...I can't tell if that's clever or just gross. So...congrats?

Oh, come on, you almost make her sound like a horrible tyrant! I'm a big girl, Jack, Athena knows that.

[ ... Okay, it would be really fucking hilarious to see Jack drunk off his ass. Maybe she'll take Athena along to hide in the shadows and watch Janey screw with the guy. ]

Wooow, that's where you draw the line? Color me real shocked, Jack.

She also hates me.

Hey, I'm just saying that I can't decide if what I assume was an oral sex joke was clever or gross. No, shocked would be your wife when she walked in on me railing Nisha over my desk that one time.

Or that other time.

After that I don't think it was really shocking anymore.

Ooookaaaaay, that was an answer to a question I never wanted to ask! So, thanks for that, pal.

[Jack snaps his fingers as though remembering something.]

Oh yeah, that's right! You'd probably rather hear about the times I nailed Moxxi.

'Cause I nailed Moxxi. Like a ton.

Ehhh. She probably just felt bad for ya.

What the hell crawled up your jumpsuit and died?

And just what would she feel sorry for? My amazing good looks? My epic wealth? My rocking body? 'Sorry' isn't what all that inspires, trust me.

Pity doesn't turn anybody's panties into a lake, either.

August-September Testo Doraivu!

TEST DRIVE MEME

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