[ IIt's the gawking that she uses as a measure to guess his bruising isn't that bad. Therefore, there will be no mercy.

She proceeds to act like none of that happened. She has the answer she was looking for, and he's fine. Minus all the things which are not actually fine, so... physically sound. Who knows what to do about the rest. ]

Is that really the primary goal around here? Raising little monsters?

[ Her tone is supremely dry, because if that's the case, aren't they technically well suited for it. It's the one and only parenting model she knows, after all. You were born for this mission. Raising little monsters, then telling them to come back home. ]

You think. [ She says this like she's a breath away from a sigh; then she does sigh, tapping her thumb on the screen. She looks up, frowning. ] Is it possible to have any of these registered to someone else?

[ ............................. she grimaces. ]

Or would you say people are helpful enough here that they'd send messages to friends when you've managed to misplace your [ she hefts the device ] means of contacting them otherwise?

[ Please forgive someone who has had zero chill time. ]