ohmyarceus | January - February Test drive

[ He didn't mean to snort. Honest. It just... came out. He clears his throat immediately after. ]

Sorry. I just— that's not true. Ideally, of course, you can log out of a virtual game, but there are absolutely times when it has not been an option for people. At all.

[ There's at least still some relief in not being able to die. ]

That's... good. An improvement. I mean, not that you died. Or lost your arm. That's— ... Unfortunate. [ God how did anyone make this kid King of anything with how bad he is at this. ] Sorry.

Oh, as real as I was made.

I would not call myself such, were it inaccurate.

Ichigo rolls his eyes. "It's not a Fraccion. This world? Pretty sure it's the same as a game I used to play years ago with my sisters. He's something called a pokemon, his species just looks kinda like a hollow. But he's flesh and blood, just like you are now."

Vox trilled curiously, lifting a paw at Cubone. "Vul? Vul vulpix."

Was Julian snickering at the sight of Grimmjow? You're damn right he was. The Charmander at his side seemed equally amused. It was probable that neither of them had seen someone so covered in stringshot like this before. It looked a little, uh. Well, the connection seemed easy enough to make to Julian.

"Duuuude," he said. "What the hell did you do?" It was pretty obvious he'd somehow pissed off every Pokemon that made stringshot, but how? Even Julian hadn't managed to piss off the local Pokemon that much, and he could barely keep his mouth shut most of the time.

Dark Cave

[Exploring caves is hardly anything new for G'rhyf. The utter lack of light is a little concerning (not a single crystal or strange fungus to shed light down here? really?), but it's not insurmountable. A sturdy branch and the sacrifice of part of a towel later, they have a perfectly serviceable torch to light the way! Their little companion seems less confident, but so far this little trek hasn't been too difficult.]

[Keywords 'so far'.]

[The previous obstacles had been easy enough to find a way past, whether by G'rhyf's own ingenuity or their companion's considerable power. But this boulder is not so easily shattered, and far too large to move. But perhaps, G'rhyf had thought, the spaces around might be wide enough to crawl through...Ralts and their bag made it through easily enough, but G'rhyf only manages to shimmy half-way through before the stone just happens to shift to the side slightly, and--well.]

[Depending on the direction you come from, you'll see either G'rhyf's torso or legs lying dejectedly over the boulder, and with their front comes a very worried little Ralts jumping up and down with a torch levitating over his head. Upon seeing or hearing your approach, however, they perk up and squirm slightly.]

Hey! A little help here?

Network

[The video opens on a blurry view of the ground before the camera is swapped to the correct side. The young man looks utterly miserable, their expression pulled tight with pain, and they shift as if trying to get into a comfortable position.]

So, ah...I could use a little bit of advice. I made a poor choice in foraging earlier, and whatever is in these fruits set in rather fast. [They hold up a Cherri berry with a few bites taken out of it, wincing slightly with the movement.] If this is what happens to your joints with age, I think I'll be happier with a young death to be perfectly frank. If anyone knows of some way to alleviate the symptoms I'd greatly appreciate it.

[Oh. Oh no. This poor guy made the same mistake Sasha once did. Going around putting strange fruit in their mouths... a shame. She has the answer to his question, of course, but he may not like it.]

You have to wait until you poop it out, sir.

[........................]

...alright, next question, then: any of these plants work as a laxative?

Well... all of them make you poop. They're not meant for us to eat. They're made for Pokemon only.

[So it would probably be best he camp out at the local public bathroom and fast.]

i. Network | Video | (New Bark Town)

[The video opened to Julian not even paying attention to the camera. Rather, he was looking down next to him, where his Charmander was standing, out of frame. He--Julian, not the Charmander--was dressed in a hooded leather jacket, a white shirt, jeans, and sneakers. His hair was buzzed short.]

Chaaaaar.

[The little Pokemon said, and Julian finally looked up.]

Oh! Hey. Hello. I guess this thing is on? Okay like, where am I? This is not LA and I don't remember getting jumped.

[Of course, he hadn't remembered the last time, either, and what a mess that'd been... Ignoring that, though-

He crouched down next to his Pokemon, getting the Charmander in the frame next to him.]

Also this little guy? The cutest. Like, holy shit. But, uh. What is it, what do I name it, what's going on?

[More importantly, where were his friends, where was Yadriel, but- he was trying to focus on figuring out where he was and what was going on first. Before he started worrying about everything else. Of course, he was already worrying about those things, he just wasn't worrying about them out loud. Yet.]

ii. Ruins of Alph

[This place was a lot quieter than Julian would have preferred, but it was still pretty cool. And really pretty. It wasn't LA but it was something, that was for sure. Except for when his Charmander stopped walking and started staring at something off to the side. Julian followed its gaze but there was nothing there.

Crouching down next to the Pokemon, he waved a hand in front of its face, but it only blinked, not looking away from whatever had caught its attention.]

You're starting to freak me out, man.

[Was this place haunted or something? Just the idea made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. He looked around quickly, straightening back up. Just when he was telling himself it was nothing when he heard a freaky noise--his PokeGear glitching out and starting to play the radio all on its own.

With a shrill yelp, Julian bolted, Charmander forgotten about. He made it about four steps before he tripped over some rubble in the grass and landed on his face. He groaned in vague pain as his Pokemon hurried over, patting him on the shoulder.]

Chaar...

[God, was anyone watching him? Had anyone seen him make a fool of himself? He didn't even lift his head to find out, but he'd accept his fate either way.]

iii. Wildcard

[ooc: come at me with something else! I'll also do prose.]

Worms...?

[It's then that Gregory realizes something is getting lost in translation here, but he's also like. 10. Does he care to figure out what, or does he know how to explain the intricacies of the inner workings of robots and stuff?

No, no he does not.]

Either way, just keep an eye out. She's dangerous.

[Good news! All of nature is a bathroom if you're desperate enough.]

Ugh, wonderful--wait. 'Made' for poke-eh-mon?

[Sasha knows this is true, but the real question is, does this newbie know which leaves to use for toilet paper and which ones not to?]

I apologize. I think I used the wrong word. [She turns around so she's facing out her bedroom window, showing a little garden out in the backyard of this house. In neat little rows are a few berry bushes in bloom.] They aren't made. They grow on bushes for Pokemon to eat.

[...usually!]

[But now they've gone and made this poor kid feel foolish, oh heck.] Oh, I assumed they grow normally! I thought you meant the fruits were literally designed by someone to be eaten by these creatures.

[It's not like the idea of such is entirely foreign to them, after all...]

No, no, I'm sorry. I'm... still learning [how to read and write beyond a third grade level] which words are right to use in sentences.

[Turning the camera back to her face, Sasha frowns.]

I don't think someone can make fruits. Make things from fruits... like a cake! Or ice cream! But not fruits themselves. I've only seen them grow on bushes and trees.

"I mean that he's a cannibalistic ghost in our world. He's used t' things being a different way, and he thinks that little Cubone is the same kind of creature."

Ichigo knew Grimmjow was wrong, but they were the same, and he wasn't going to let someone bully the arrancar.

Still, I could have been clearer in my intent.

[Anyway--G'rhyf huffs out a wry chuckle and nods, head cocking slightly to the side with a small grin.] No, it would be a very rare sort indeed that could make something out of nothing. But I have run into it before...where I was before, not here, obviously!

[Clarity!]

[Awww~]

Good, I'm glad. And of course, having a good support network is important as well. Please don't hesitate to reach out on the network or one-on-one should you need anything.

[What is it with people putting whatever in their mouths without knowing anything about it before hand? Honestly, if he didn't know better, he'd feel as though he was watching Azem in action.]

How poorly you age is in direct proportion to how well you take care of yourself within your youth. Which we all can see you are doing rather swimmingly at that.

[Not at all helpful.]

Might I suggest ere you put unfamiliar objects in your mouth again you familiarize yourself with them first?

[Yeah, that isn't much better.]

[ A REAL

NINJA

DETECTIVE!!!!!!

If this is an NPC, this is the BEST NPC ANYONE HAS EVER MADE IN THE HISTORY OF THE UNIVERSE. He needs to play it cool. He needs to not just stare at him with shock and an open mouth and everything like he is uhh

Right this second ]

That is the most impressive and insanely awesome title I have ever heard of in my entire life. And I've heard some really cool titles.

Why thank you.

I shall endeavor to live up to such lofty admiration.

[Several thoughts pass through G'rhyf's head in rapid succession. First: "Why is Emet-Selch alive, I just told him to go take a nap!". Second: "What is he doing back in Solus's body?". Third: "What in all the seven hells did this that could drag HIM somewhere against his will?!".]

[And then, finally: "Wow?? Rude???"]

[Their initial incredulous expression falls quickly into an irritated scowl, and--Thal's balls, they are not going to get used to the loss of their natural ears!] Hey, I tested it on my arm first, it didn't have a reaction there!! And I take perfectly fine care of myself, thank you very much!

[Liar.]

Are you going to actually offer help, or are you just here to laugh at my misfortune?

And, as you can see--or feel in this case--those tests are not always accurate. What might not irritate the skin could very well damage more sensitive tissues elsewhere. Like the bowels, for instance.

[Hm, he definitely doesn't want to be talking about this Miqo'te's bowels. Moving on.]

But tell me: are you always so entitled when it comes to demanding for others to clean up your mistakes, or am I merely special?

[He doesn't allow G'rhyf to answer before he starts again.]

'Tis no matter. Unless you are near a Pokémon center, your best option is to stay hydrated and rest. The poisons here are not entirely fatal, more inconvenient than aught else. You will be miserable while it works through your system. Consider it a lesson.

[They grumble and straight up start sulking, clearly slouching down against the tree they're sitting under. How does he always manage to piss them off and still be right every time?]

I don't think it's entitled to think I've earned a tiny hint of respect by now, Emet-Selch. [HUFF.] So how long have you been stuck here?

[See, he'd be more than happy to answer that question, however he is currently stuck on one teeny tiny little detail: the use of his name and that familiarity he does not share.]

...Excuse me?

January - February Test drive

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Cherrygrove

G'rhyf Kett (Warrior of Light) | FFXIV

Network

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Julian Diaz | Cemetery Boys | OTA

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Network;

1/2

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