vrdantwind: (The light around us)
Claude von Riegan ([personal profile] vrdantwind) wrote in [community profile] ohmyarceus 2022-01-03 12:32 am (UTC)

It. Or them! Whichever it prefers, really. I've got one of my own, and ghosts don't really bother with the whole concept of gender, on the whole. I mean, it's possessing a teacup.

[Claude's voice stays effortlessly light and breezy as he continues chattering about something blatantly unimportant. Which has really always been his modus operandi - deflecting with humor, never letting anything get too deep, never letting himself be too vulnerable. Emotional intimacy with Claude isn't easily achieved, not for someone who'd spent so long barely having anyone to trust, anyone who actually liked him enough not to hurt him if he got the chance. Outside of Nader and his parents, he'd scarcely had anyone like that in Almyra...and if he'd found people in Fodlan who were different, he'd still never dared to trust them completely. Not enough to share his secrets with them...or to let himself wholly believe that doing so wouldn't change their minds. Even once he'd actively fallen in love with Dimitri and Felix and Sylvain...he'd been terrified of their reaction, even as he'd told them. And maybe still wouldn't have, if it hadn't felt so necessary at that juncture.

With Lorenz, someone he'd been deeply fond of but who'd also turned on him...letting this conversation get too deep, too intense, feels like vulnerability. So he sidesteps it.

Or tries to, but of course Lorenz has to spoil his best-laid plans. His father wishes he was half as good at foiling Claude's schemes. But for all Claude's uneasiness at the conversation jack-knifing in a direction he'd rather it didn't go, his own discomfort doesn't really sit front and center. Lorenz looks so...miserable. And for all Lorenz's faults, Claude had liked him - still likes him. That's the only reason the betrayal had stung the way it had. Deep down, Lorenz still feels like one of his Deer.

And seeing what is clearly guilt on Lorenz's face, and hearing that apology...it confirms some of Claude's guesses about just how much influence Count Gloucester had on what happened. Not even Claude's best spies had been able to find out much, so he'd been left to wonder just how much of the betrayal was Lorenz and how much was his father...but either this is the remorse of someone who realizes they were wrong only after they've comprehensively failed, or - more likely - this points to the bulk of the responsibility being on the elder Gloucester's end.

...even then, Claude still tries to think of some way to drag the moment back to something lighthearted. He wrestles with it for a second or two before giving in with a sigh.]
I'm not sure how much of an apology I'm owed. Just how much luxury of choice did you have? I guessed your father probably had a hand in things.

Post a comment in response:

This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting