JULY - AUGUST TEST DRIVE MEME

[indigo_events]

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Comments

[waitatick]

He didn't notice her until her nod of acknowledgement, and while she looked...different here, he was able to recognize her immediately.

Still, he chose to wait for her to decide to come to him, if she was going to. Far be it from him to presume, after all, even in a ridiculous dream. They'd only just returned from Oriande and she'd demanded he sleep before he "woke" here, after all, and it made perfect sense that she'd be in the dream as well.

"..Princess?" he called after her as she turned to walk away from him, seeming almost upset. At what, he could not fathom, but in the way of dreams he supposed he would have to find out.

[lioness_rampant]

The sound of his voice froze her on the spot, like icy claws sinking into her chest. It was a voice she knew she could never forget as long as she lived. It felt like an impossible feat of willpower to turn and look at him, and seeing him again she wondered how she could have mistaken him for anyone else. If all of her worst mistakes could have been given a face, it would have been his.

"Lotor."

How could he be here? How was it possible? But, of course, it was just as possible as her being alive. Anger and guilt twisted in her gut, making her limbs quail. He didn't look enraged or maniacal as he had in his last moments, but that didn't mean anything. He'd been good at lying to her.

"You... you're here."

[waitatick]

Being from the point in time he was, Lotor had no idea of the events that had transpired, but if he'd known her thoughts he'd have vehemently disagreed. He had never lied to her. Omitted, certainly. Misdirected, undoubtedly. But there had never been an outright lie. Even the Altean distress signal had been genuine, in its way.

Still, all he knew was that she was upset. Very much so, and it was painful to see after leaving her so happy and proud only dobashes before he'd woken here.

"Yes." It was quiet and more than a little confused. "As are you. I do apologize that this dream is so strange."

[lioness_rampant]

Suffice to say their opinions would differ on that point, when the omission had been the fact that she wasn't the last of her people.

"Dream? It isn't a dream, Lotor. This is another reality." Another opportunity for things to get wildly out of hand, though she's not sure it's possible for them to end as badly as they did the first time.

From the hood of the jacket she's wearing, a sleepy Pachirisu emerges, draping itself over Allura's shoulder and chitters questioningly. Allura sighs.

"What is the last thing you remember? From before?"

[waitatick]

"Ah. A strange reality, then."

But he wasn't terribly bothered. If this was a dream, it made no real difference, and if it was truly another reality it seemed pleasant enough for the moment. Her presence undoubtedly helped his opinion, but he didn't have time to consider before smiling at the small creature. "Hello," he told it softly. Allura's mice had become quite familiar to him and while this was obviously no mouse, he was not surprised that it liked her.

"You insisted that I sleep only dobashes ago. Possibly a varga? We had only just returned from Oriande, and were both quite tired, though I believe you did it more so I might have time to process my defeat."

I keep changing tenses wtf @ myself

[lioness_rampant]

"Oriande."

Allura's eyes went wide, thinking back to that fateful expedition and all that had transpired in Oriande--and how much was yet to come for him. It made her feel sick thinking of the fate that awaited him... both of them, really. The fact that he was there now didn't change anything. They would both still meet their ends eventually.

There were so many things she wanted to say that none of them managed to find their way to her lips. Unbidden, tears welled in her eyes, and she turned away again to prevent him from seeing them.

You're grand! And I'm so sorry for putting you through this, Allura

[waitatick]

Her reaction was so far from expected that it caught him very off guard, and all he could do for a tick or two was stare at her back, the distress radiating from her in waves hitting his heart as though she'd launched a physical blow.

He took a step toward her before abruptly stopping himself, not wanting to exacerbate the situation further.

"It is obvious that my presence here is causing you a great deal of distress, Princess. I do not wish to be the cause of any further suffering, and shall not bother you again in this reality unless you should choose to seek me out."

He wanted to ask what was wrong, what had happened, what he'd done as it was so obvious that her pain was connected to him, but the priority was her comfort, not his curiosity.

[lioness_rampant]

Listening to his voice, Allura had to wonder how he could always manage to be so smooth. It was as infuriating as it was heartbreaking, but she'd exposed herself too much. Wiping at her eyes briefly, she turned to face him again, but this time she seemed more collected--not nervous or afraid, not weeping. It was an effort, but she was steady.

"I'm going to ask you a question, Lotor, and if... if you ever cared for me, even the slightest bit, I hope you'll answer me honestly." She knew she didn't look intimidating, with her bolt of fabric and her cute pokemon and her pastel clothes, but there was an edge in her voice that she hoped would communicate just how serious she was being in the moment.

"If someone you claimed to care about was suffering under the belief that they'd lost everything--that they were the last of their species--would you allow them to carry on in this belief if you knew otherwise? Or would you tell them?"

[waitatick]

Intimidating, no, but she didn't need to. The very way she phrased the question let him know that she had learned of the colonies, and not from his own mouth. That she was so upset spoke to a grave misunderstanding, but as he did not know the situation at all, he could not speak to it as yet.

"I would not tell you as to do so would be to give knowledge of them to the witch, and with the information that they exist she would destroy them all. Do you think that I did not wish to tell you every tick? I could not risk their discovery. I still cannot."

It was said quietly and with his eyes on the ground, unable to look at her.

"It was never meant as some manner of trickery, but we both know that you tend to react emotionally and the last thing I could risk was you demanding the location to go immediately. She monitors everything, Allura. She has done so all my life. She would follow us there and from that...she would have a source of power great enough to do anything she might like. It was never meant to hurt you."

[lioness_rampant]

Fists clenched at her side, Allura could feel her nails digging into the skin of her palms hard enough to sting, her entire body going tense at his response. From her shoulder, Trigel reached up to pat her cheek with a soft "Pachi?" of concern.

She laughed suddenly, but it was a bitter sound.

"To think this is how I seem to you--like a child who can't be expected to act rationally when the lives of thousands of people are at stake. Thousands of my people, believed lost forever! I trusted you, Lotor! I believed you! But... you didn't trust me, and now you lay this excuse at my feet only because I already know the truth. Yet, if it was too dangerous to even disclose to me the fact that the colonies existed lest Honerva discover them, then why did we go to Oriande? Did it not occur to you that she might find that place as well if she was monitoring you so closely? That she might gain access to it and use the alchemic secrets of our ancestors to unleash unprecedented destruction on the universe?"

Allura paused a moment to let the gravity of her words sink in before taking a step back. She was furious, but her face was deathly calm.

"What's done is done, Lotor. We parted ways deca-phoebs ago, and I can't go back."

[waitatick]

Never," Lotor bit out, his anger at how he'd gone about everything so colossally terribly causing a growl to lace his words. "I never once saw you as a child, Princess. It was myself I did not trust - had you asked it of me I'd have taken you immediately and I could not risk myself leading her to them.

Oriande is not a place I ever wanted her to see but when compared to the thousands of lives in danger it was the preferred option, as well as necessary. Had I been able to pass the trials I'd have told you immediately and defeated her outright. Anything Altean in her was killed in the Rift - she would never pass the trials and even had she, the power to stop her was within our grasp. Oriande is sacred to me and I am honored to have seen it, especially with you. But to choose between it and the colonies - that choice was worth it and I would make it again a thousand times."

He desperately wanted to ask what had happened, how she'd come to know all this, where she was in their timeline...so many things. But the finality of her final statement pierced his heart and he realized that it didn't matter. She'd made her choice and while he didn't have all the details, he would respect it.

"Never think that I do not care for you, Allura. I am truly sorry for everything you have learned, and that I could not trust myself enough to trust you completely."