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[Vaughn placed his hands on his knees, crouching down to look over the creature in front of him. There were a lot of... interesting things happening. For starters, the only time Vaughn saw something relatively close to green was when he put on his scarf in the morning. The sudden explosion of trees everywhere he looked (especially in the place that clearly wasn't camp) was all a bit... much.]

[From far away, the thing almost looked normal. Sure, Vaughn hadn't actually seen a domesticated animal since college (the occasional weary and wounded skag didn't count), but he was pretty sure he knew what a dog was supposed to look like. It definitely wasn't supposed to have rocks on its neck, at the very least.]

[And then there was the annoying background music, which sounded a little like a game that he--]

[His thoughts were chased away as the dog bounded to his side, shoving his snout against Vaughn's nose. He let out a laugh and picked the creature up.]

You're uh... You're awfully friendly, aren't you? You got some kind of owner? An alpha? [Vaughn glanced around warily.] A bandit dad that's going to rip out my entrails for touching you?

[He hoped not.]

B: Video

[One of the comforts that came from the change in Vaughn's scenery was the technology. It was a little inferior to what he was familiar with, but certainly a lot better than the damaged scrap that he'd been able to kick up on Pandora. After running about with the dog creature that had apparently decided to be his friend, Vaughn found himself rifling through his pack. After plucking out a few things and setting them aside for later, he finally found the Pokegear.]

[Figuring out the interface was easy enough. Antiquated or not, most tech seemed to follow the same sorts of patterns. It didn't take the man long to figure out the broadcasting options, and even less time to start recording.]

I, uh... I think this thing is recording? Still trying to figure all this out though. Vintage tech is nice and all but... gotta wonder what's going on. Is this some kind of Pandoran torture thing? Is Hyperion out there listening, messing with my head for squatting on their property? Because look, you try living out in the middle of the desert with a camp of infants.

I mean. [Vaughn trailed off, scratching at his beard.] Look this is all kind of weird to me. Familiar, almost? I can't put my finger on it, but it feels like I should be recognizing something, you know?

If it helps, I've never heard of a place called Pandora. I don't think we're in any real danger here.

[This place is certainly bizarre, but Asami is pretty confident that whatever brought them here isn't trying to torture them. Well, the music is starting to get annoying.]

What about this place is familiar to you? Do you think you've been here before?

[Not to put pressure on the visibly stressed stranger, but Asami isn't too keen on staying here herself. For now she'll ignore the remark about squatting with infants.]

That... helps a lot, actually.

[That she hadn't heard of Pandora, at least. Weird that he managed to wake up somewhere that wasn't the desert planet from hell, but he'd focus on that later. At least he wasn't at risk of getting cannibalized. Hopefully.]

Yeah, uh, I'd remember it if I'd been here before. [He pointed upward, somewhere off-screen] Background music is... a little... [He trailed off, brows pulling tightly together. That couldn't be...]

Kinda like a video game, y'know?

We don't have anything called a video game where I'm from.

[She had found what were apparently games on the pokegear, but she hadn't figured out exactly how they were supposed to be played. Who was she supposed to play against?

But 'game' is a word she recognize, so they can work backwards from that, at least.]

This place reminds you of a game you used to play. That's... kind of weird. Well, this whole place is weird, isn't it?

[She gave up trying to find where the music was coming from hours ago.]

[Never heard of a video game? Vaughn's expression became even more confused. He rubbed his feet together off-screen, an unconscious and nervous sort of fidget.]

Yeah, uh. You could say that again. [He looked down at the dog nestled at his side, then up at the device in his hand.] You get a weird creature too? [He twisted the camera around, facing it toward the "Rockruff," who glanced up at the screen and gave a friendly yap.]

I'm Vaughn, by the way. [He turned the camera back to him.]

[....well look at that. And just when Jack thought the influx of bandit assholes had stopped. Welp, time to mess with the dickhead!]

Hyperion's always listening, cupcake.

[Well, that voice was certainly enough to send a chill down the bandit lord's spine. He'd never had the displeasure of dealing with Jack directly, he'd done a good job of flying under the radar. Sure, he'd gotten pushed around from time to time for being too spineless, but unlike some of his friends, his disinterest in social climbing (at least on his own) had kept him from the fates that had befallen them.]

[But Vaughn didn't want to think about that. Couldn't stop to think about it, because not answering Handsome Jack was probably just as bad as giving the wrong answer. He didn't know where the man was, didn't know of the tyrannical CEO knew where he was, but he wasn't going to risk it.]

[Not that he had anything good to say...]

I, uh. [His throat felt tight, as if Jack's hands were already around it. Months of carefully cultivated bravado and conditioning seemed to leak out of him. The meek chump that he had left behind in that wintery Atlas facility reared his ugly head once again.]

I didn't realize I wasn't alone here, sir.

The far reaching and all embracing arms of Hyperion mean you're never alone!

No matter what.

Or if you wanna be or not!

K, uh. That's... [Creepy? Horrifying? Almost certain to spell his death.] Good to know.

[Spineless bastard.]

Yeah it is.

Bad news is...you are a long, long way from home. Like off the charted galaxies long way.

[Vaughn felt his stomach drop. He knew he was off Pandora, but galaxies?]

Don't suppose you know a way to get back? I have -- [He held his tongue. The last thing he wanted was to advertise the fact that he had a bunch of Hyperion refugees squatting in Jack's former castle.] I left my oven on. I think.

Oh yeah, sure.... I mean, obviously I'm just here for my own health. I'm just the kind of guy who would abandon his entire empire to dick around with fuzzy alien animals in the middle of nowhere. We're not at all all stuck here thanks to an insane space llama.

[Did somebody ask for a bandit dad?

...Okay, maybe "dad" is the wrong word, but he definitely looks the part of a Pandoran bandit.

...Okay, maybe "bandit" is the wrong word, too. "Psycho" is probably a better word. He's got the physique and the mask and the missing shirt for it, after all.

Also, that's kind of what he is. So at least that's that, figured out!

He's actually just passing through, on his way from Point A to Point B on some mysterious psycho errand, accompanied by his newest monster buddy. He's trying to train the little guy up, but said little guy really isn't a big fan of the whole "exercise" thing Krieg's got going. It follows gamely along in Krieg's wake but doesn't put in much more effort than that.

Krieg notices Vaughn, of course, because he's always on high alert when out and about. He doesn't normally stop for strangers, but that beard is hauntingly familiar, and also that dog is really cute, so he pauses and squints while he tries to place where he's seen the guy before. That gives the Mudbray a chance to catch up, bump gently into his knees at his unexpected stop, and then meander off to the side to begin grazing.

It takes Krieg a moment or two of silent staring - something he's been told he needs to stop doing because it unnerves people - before the familiarity clicks.]

It's Shield Lady's beard!

[...Nailed it.]

[Maybe it's the fact that psychos aren't known for being quiet, or perhaps it's just inherited Pandoran instinct, but Vaughn felt the psycho's eyes on him long before he actually spoke. At first, he pretended not to notice, hoping to slink out of the area before he could make a run at him.]

[But then he had to go and yell, thoroughly confusing the newly-minted bandit.]

[Vaughn lifted a hand to his beard, scratching at it as he tried to parse out the psycho-babble that the man was spewing. Beard made sense, he was used to being identified as such by the other psychos he had met (and killed, or at least chased off). But shield lady...]

Athena? [Vaughn's eyes widened. Finally, something familiar and at least slightly less likely to kill him.] You know her? Angry lady, only slightly taller than me? [He lifted a hand up, hovering it over his head.] Looks like she wants to kill a man. Probably has some bloodstains on her?

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December-January Test Drive Meme!

TEST DRIVE MEME

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