ohmyarceus | Test Drive Meme

This scene is happening for the second time today - because despite what he said in front of Emporio, Joseph was absolutely willing to grab Rush's mouth again as soon as the Charmander started disobeying him. And now he has no gloves, so he's greeting Jotaro with a wave from a clearly mechanical left hand.

"Training, obviously." He stands up properly, looking Jotaro over as he speaks. "As soon as I can get him to come when called I'll be out of here."

He's staring for a little longer than feels socially appropriate. After all, he's not used to other men being quite as tall or as well-built as him. He has a few questions on his mind, but he's waiting for slightly more information to trickle in before he risks sounding crazy. His Charmander, meanwhile, lets out another hiss at Joseph and crawls backward, further under the bench.

Edited 2025-04-04 11:28 (UTC)

Don't worry. Once he's there, Jotaro will be staring right back at him. While Joseph may only have a hunch of who Jotaro is, Jotaro will know exactly who this is. Even if he had never seen a photo of his grandfather when young, Jotaro would recognise him: Mechanical left hand? Same height as him? Idiotic look on his face? There's no mistaking...

"Good grief. Guess I can't really call you gramps now, can I?"

Without elaborating further to his teenage grandfather, Jotaro kneels down to the Charmander. He's not surprised the poor creature is skittish - animals don't seem to like his grandfather for some reason.

"Easy now... No need to be angry. You're okay..." He says gently to the Pokemon, trying to calm it down.

Next to him, Jotaro's Crustle waddles up and chirps a reassurance. Hey friend. It's okay. No need to hide... The bad man can't hurt you if they're here!

That's it, that's all the confirmation he really needed. After all, he may not know Jotaro but he can see some of the family resemblance. It's hard to miss, especially when he knows to be on the look-out for it.

"No, I guess not. Maybe I should be calling you gramps."

The Charmander, who at this point seems to like everyone except for Joseph, carefully crawls back out from under the bench and sniffs Jotaro. He seems immediately more relaxed, maybe because he realizes there's no way for Joseph to snatch him back with an equally large man protecting him.

"Emporio mentioned you were older than me, I didn't realize you'd be this old - I guess Hamon stopped running in the family."

Short of pulling down their shirts and showing off the Joestar birthmark, it's as good as they're going to get. Jotaro honestly resembles his grandfather more than he would like too - neither his mother or father have the height or the gains Joseph does.

Jotaro extends his hand for the Charmander and when it's a little more comfortable with him he reaches out to scratch it gently. As he does so, he frowns.

"...How old do you think I am?" Jotaro asks. It's a strange feeling, being older than your grandfather. He can't quite describe it but it's definitely ~~bizarre~~ weird.

The Crustle behind Jotaro begins to slink behind Joseph. Don't mind the walking hermit crab please. He's a bit of a prankster and Jotaro isn't watching...

Jotaro should be proud of him, he manages to bite back his first instinct of just the largest number he can think of. Joseph puts some actual thought into it, mumbling aloud as he does.

"Well, let's see... I was born in 1920, I was going to turn 19 soon when I ended up here. So the earliest your father could have been born is probably 1939... And more than likely you were born around 1960... Well, maybe a little later so let's say you're around 55? Assuming there was no more time-traveling involved."

He's busy enough with this train of thought that while he sees the Crustle moving, he hasn't actually clocked what it's up to. He's too focused on watching Jotaro for a reaction, and trying to quell the jealous outrage of Rush trying to crawl into Jotaro's arms for attention.

That's good logic. Unfortunately... Ouch. Somehow, this hurts more than just picking a really big number. Not that it shows on Jotaro's face...

"Good grief, Jiji. I'm only 41. ...Since you're so bad at guessing ages, I'd better tell you that your great-granddaughter, who's been here 5 years, is 25."

Jotaro can't see that Joseph is getting upset about Rush but he can guess it without turning around, knowing his grandfather. Jotaro readily accepts the Charmander and picks him up into his arms, stroking his back gently.

"There you go, you're alright."

The Crustle smirks behind Joseph and holds up one of his claws. Without warning, he gives Joseph a hard nip on the ass. Nothing too hard, just enough to make Joseph jump.

"...What, did you have her when you were- FUCK!"

OUCH. Joseph does jump, kind of shockingly high, and turns around to aim a kick at the Crustle. He is doing his best to make it light, partly because he doesn't really want to commit to his leg being in pinching distance, but he's also become sharply aware of the fact that he can't feel his Hamon moving through him. And that's... going to be lodged in the back of his mind for a while, maybe until he tracks Emporio down to ask him about it. He has to look cool in front of his grandson (which he's definitely succeeding at).

"Holy fucking shit, why are you letting that stupid crab just wander around!?"

Jotaro has a retort ready but it's forgotten as Joseph screams. The Crustle isn't particularly fast and he's not trying to escape anyways, so Jotaro can easily kick his hard shell. Hope you like kicking concrete, Joseph. The Crustle in question will be laughing hysterically, very much pleased with himself.

"Oy Joseph! What did I say about pinching people?" Jotaro scowls at his Crustle. He stands up, Rush still in his arms like a toddler. "Bastard... I told you no more pranks."

"Crustle! Crustle!" The Crustle tries to plead his case, that it was justified! That he was only trying to teach this arrogant trainer a lesson! But his pleas fall on deaf ears.

"We're practicing not doing shit like that, right Joe?" Jotaro says, not realising he used his Crustle's full nickname in front of his grandfather. "But if it's gonna be like that, it's back into the ball."

At least the Crustle is getting in trouble, which gets an impish grin creeping onto Joseph's face.

Until the Pokemon's name clicks.

Then he glances from Jotaro, to the Crustle, back to Jotaro, a few times. And the outrage is right back.

"What the hell, man? Did you name a crab after me? What the hell did I ever do to you!?"

His mechanical hand has started clicking, fingers jerking back and forth in ways that normal fingers really shouldn't. He can't use his Hamon, but oh it's so tempting to try and rearrange Jotaro's face even without it. Especially since Rush is also laughing at him, and doesn't stop even during the lecture.

The Crustle does plead with Jotaro but doesn't even get the satisfaction of watching Joseph realise his namesake. Jotaro returns Joe into his Pokeball and stashes the Pokeball in his pocket. He sighs but even before the concept of an apology can cross his mind, Joseph is already growling at him. Good grief, his grandfather really is a punk, isn't he?

Jotaro rolls his eyes.

"You're not special. I've named Pokemon after my friends and my father already." Wow, Jotaro. "And it's not because it's a crab. It's because it's a hermit crab. Like Hermit Purple." Wait, does his grandfather even have that power yet? No, he wouldn't, if it only manifested when Jotaro himself was a teenager.

"...It makes sense when you're actually my grandfather."

Edited 2025-04-04 14:44 (UTC)

He has to really process that for a few seconds, trying to make sense of it. Hermit Purple... hermit crabs.... um.... nope, he can't think of any connections. Jotaro must be right, that it will make sense in the future.

"But a crab?" He grumbles, "Why not something cool like a dog, or a dragon, or... anything else? And can you hand me my stupid lizard back?"

He reaches for Rush, and the Charmander hisses a warning, fully ready to breathe fire at him again.

"There's no such thing as a hermit dog. Or hermit dragon. That just makes no sense." Duh, Joseph. "And hermit crabs aren't even real crabs anyway. They're Anomura. True crabs have four pairs of walking legs. Hermit crabs only have three pairs that can walk, the fourth usually being too small to walk."

That, and crabs are definitely cool, excuse you, gramps.

"What did you do to piss this guy off anyway?" Jotaro asks as he pets the Charmander gently to calm it down. "They wouldn't attack you unless you gave them a good reason for it..."

Even as he gives a derisive snort, he is filing that information away. It's interesting trivia, even if he's annoyed by it in the moment.

"I don't know, he just came like that." Joseph rolls his eyes, but he does slow down and just offer his prosthetic hand for Rush to sniff. "That strange woman who handed him to me was handling him just fine, and then as soon as I grabbed him he got all pissy. He won't follow me so I had to drag him around, and he keeps getting loose and hiding."

Rush does sniff his hand, still hesitant but unable to fully shake the bond between trainer and Pokemon. But one of the mechanical fingers twitches suddenly, and he reacts by biting Joseph again.

"God damn it! See?"

"Well, for start, you grabbed him. If a strange man grabbed me, I would be upset. And if he dragged me around, I'd punch him to hell and back. Pokemon are not unlike children: while they can be reasoned with and talked to, they're usually just driven by animal instinct. You startled Rush so he bit you."

Jotaro sighs. He pulls the Charmander back gently but firmly, signalling to the Pokemon that he should probably let go of the metal.

"On the other end of the scale, have you tried to do anything to gain your Charmander's trust? Or have you just subjected it to your whims as usual?"

Rush releases Joseph's hand, although he's left a few minor dents in the metal. Joseph is going to have to find someone who can take a look at it soon, the way things are going - although he'd rather that than deal with a Charmander bite on his flesh.

"Okay, well, maybe I haven't put much effort into making friends with him. That just means I got the wrong pet, if he was a dog he'd just trust that I have good intentions."

This is a lie, and Joseph has definitely gotten bitten by dogs before. But he is at least taking Jotaro's feedback on board, even if he's struggling to put it into action.

"How am I supposed to get his trust? He's already impossible to handle... although he seems to like you just fine."

"Hmph. Doubt it. Some dogs can be real assholes," Jotaro says, smirking as he thinks of a certain coffee-loving dog.

"Well, you got off on the wrong foot. It's easy to like someone after you team up with them against a common enemy." Jotaro pauses and puts his bag down. "Get some berries out of there. Feed it to your Charmander. Peace offering and all."

Joseph hesitates, but does as he's told. He grabs a berry sort of at random at offers it to Rush, with his prosthetic hand just in case. The Charmander hesitates, but takes the berry and calms down a little bit more. Even if he keeps eyeing Joseph's hands suspiciously.

"I did hear 'Mom' mention something about them liking to battle - at least we have something in common, there."

Rush's eyes light up at the mention of battles, and he starts staring eagerly at Jotaro as if begging for one to start, with the tip of his tail wiggling excitedly.

"Well... Battling is the fastest way to build a bond with someone." Jotaro puts Rush down onto the floor. He would have passed him directly to Joseph but he figures that the Charmander should go to Joseph when he's ready.

"I'm guessing this is one of your first trainer battles then, Gramps," Jotaro says, digging into his pocket and taking a Pokeball out. "But I won't go easy on you. It's better to lose against me than humiliate yourself in a gym."

"Jean. Don't show mercy." Jotaro tosses a Pokeball out and out emerges a Scraggy. The Scraggy gives a lazy yawn and looks at Rush. So they're doing this?

Joseph moves back to give the Pokemon space, although he's watching Jean with the same open fascination he's been giving every new species. Rush was already wiggling out of Jotaro's arms when he's put down, and scrambles over to take his place in front of Joseph.

"Sure - my very first one, actually. So- give me a moment, would you?"

He has to open his Pokedex and figure out what the hell Rush can actually do. Please stand by... okay, got it.

"Rush, use Ember!"

Rush rolls his eyes, but Ember was already his plan anyway. And he's very eager to aim it at the Scraggy.

Jotaro patiently waits and his Scraggy stretches to wake up properly. Jean is about ready to go by the time the battle starts and as soon as Joseph gives the command, Jean lets loose his hidden ability, Intimidate.

"Close the distance between you two! Rock Smash, Jean, and stay close," Jotaro commands. The Scraggy gives a cry of affirmation and takes the Ember. He roars and bounds up to Rush, punching the Charmander square in the face.

Rush tries to dodge out of the way, but he's far too slow and the Rock Smash hits him directly. Joseph winces, but Rush does his best to shake it off.

"Alright, try another Ember-"

Nope, Rush isn't interested in instruction. He opts instead for a Growl, while backing up to try and make more room between himself and Jean.

"-that works, too."

"Hey! Don't back down! Leer and show it who's boss." The Scraggy winces with the Growl but takes strength from Jotaro's orders. It tenses and leers at the Rush. "No mercy. Use Strength!"

The lax Scraggy smirks at that and tenses. With a tremendous cry, it charges at Rush and slugs it as hard as it can with its fist.

Rush takes the hit, toppling to the ground with an angry hiss. He's still awake, but badly hurt. And this time he doesn't wait for a command, shaking himself off and breathing his best Ember at the Scraggy.

Joseph, meanwhile, has been trying to figure out a way to give Rush can edge... but without Hamon to heal him or a good understanding of the rules of combat to play around in, he ends up just having to let Rush handle himself. It is surprisingly stressful, to not be the one doing the fighting. He's just going to be busy checking his bag for the Potions Mom packed for him.

Jotaro looks up at Joseph and frowns. He can't blame the not-old man for scrambling but he did say he wasn't going to hold back. Jotaro shakes his head and turns his attention back on the Pokemon.

"Jean, watch your right!" Jotaro calls out. Jean pulls back instinctively. Rush's Ember still hit but the damage doesn't send the Scraggy sprawling back, even with Rush's ability likely flaring up. "Low kick!"

The Scraggy rushes forward one more time and does a football slide, tackling Rush's legs before slamming his head against Rush.

Rush just barely manages to dodge out of the way, stumbling as he does so. For the first time since the battle started, he glances back at Joseph, who crouches down to call him over. "Here - let me patch you up."

There's a moment of hesitation, where the Charmander glances at Jean and has to really consider before running over so Joseph can spritz him with the Potion. It lightens the bruises on his scaly skin, but it also seems to help his mood a bit. Rush finally checks in with Joseph, looking for instruction.

"Alright, try a Scratch - aim for his eyes."

Test Drive Meme - Spring 2025

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